churchofwifi.org

About

Welcome to the Church of Wifi, this site has minimal content at the moment because EvilMog is lazy. He will get to adding more things as he has time.

Shenanigans (def)

• she·​nan·​i·​gan | \ shə-ˈna-ni-gən:

• a devious trick used especially for an underhand purpose

• tricky or questionable practices or conduct —usually used in plural

• high-spirited or mischievous activity —usually used in plural

Church of Wifi Definition of Shenanigans

The Church of Wifi defines shenanigans differently.

• Stupidity or silliness caused by not enough alcohol

• The true hacker spirit

• Doing things like dropping stuffed animals with parachutes because we can

Rules

The Church of Wifi has very few rules, although we are a bonafide religion we are also compatible with other religions. We can best be defined as absurdists in that we can never really know if life has meaning while we are alive. As a result of being absurdists we are compatible with theistic, atheistic, absurdist and even nhilistic belief systems.

• Your belief system is a personal choice, we are not an evangelical church and will not force our belief systems on others.

• Informed consent in all things is mandatory, as such you cannot join the church until you are of the age of majority.

• Alcohol and substance free options to everything shall always be available.

• The shenanigans commandments shall always be upheld.

• The DEFCON Code of Conduct shall be strictly adhered to.

• Harassment of any form to any member or non member shall not be tolerated.

Commandments

Do No Harm

• The first commandment is do no harm, just like physicians. You do not want to get kicked out/banned/arrested etc. We do not provide bail money for our members, anything you do as a member of the church is really as a private citizen.

• The sub-commandment is do not be a jerk, and shouldn’t need to be said but here we are.

• If you feel you need to cause damage, GTFO, we are a peaceful non damaging group.

• Every time you do a shenanigan put yourself on the receiving end, imagine your reaction. Is this still a good idea, if so then proceed, if not STOP RIGHT NOW.

• Imagine the publics reaction to your shenanigan, is this the kind of thing that would ruin someones day. If so stop!.

• Use shenanigans to make life a bit brighter and happier.

• Negative and harmful shenangians are called crimes.

DO the Math

Look we are smart here, when doing anything make sure you do your homework. A well planned shenanigan is an excellent shenanigan.

• If dropping, suspending, launching things, or other shenanigans involving gravity or force make sure you run your ballistic force calculations and compensate for failure.

• Make sure you weigh things if dropping or suspending stuff, add a margin of error. Heavy things and gravity lead to injuries, ensure you have parachutes or other methods to reduce harm. Make sure your parachutes are rated for the load you are dropping. Make sure the load you drop won’t hurt anybody even if the parachute fails to deploy.

• Have sober assistance to verify your math and supervise all shenanigans. The sober person should be 8 hours bottle to throttle

• Validate escape / abort plans at multiple checkpoints, and use your checklists

• If you are going to be breaking rules, ensure that conference staff are engaged and supportive

Clean Up

Look we are all adults here, cleanup after your shenanigans, don’t be a jerk and leave a mess for others.

• If anything untethered is launched be ready to retrieve it.

• If anything is launched be ready to lose it!

• Cleanups should be done in 10-15 minutes

• May require extra bodies, claning supplies, tools, etc, have them ready.

• Have a DOCUMENTED plan for cleanup you can show to conference security staff

Designated Adult

You should have a sober person to be the designated adult, this person has the ability to terminate the shenanigan at any point without argument, they can also designate contingency plans to be executed if things go sideways.

• You do not need to be drunk to enjoy a shenanigan.

• Ideas conceived while drunk or under the influence may seem like a good idea at the time, others may not enjoy it and beer goggles are a thing.

• Run all plans by the sober adult, and review them yourself when sober. If the sober adult gives the OK, then proceed carefully.

• Sober people may not enjoy your shenanigans.

• If things involve heights make sure all shenanigan operators BAC is below .04

• Double check your math by sober people and/or technical specialists.

• Do not argue with your designated adult and/or security staff.

Responsibility

We are all responsible adults, if we aren’t we shouldn’t be doing shenanigans.

• You break it you bought it, its that simple, be prepared to pay for any damage you cause.

• Plan for failure, be ready to accept resonsibility and consequences for your actions.

• Responsibility should drive the is this a good idea debate.

• Your shenangians may cause personal and unforseen slights and insults, you should be prepared to accept personal emotional respnsibility for your actions. Impacts can spread beyond financial and property.

• If you are pushing limits, be ready to get push back. Own your shenanigan and actions.

Property Damage

Now we will take a side tangent, property damage. Your shenanigans could cause property damage, this is not ideal and you MUST make ammends. We have seen cases where people have thrown jars through car windows or damaged venues. This is not an acceptable shenanigan.

• Do not throw jars of cherries through peopes car windows

• Do not permanently alter the venue or other peoples property without permission from the owner of said property.

• If you break things make it right

• Do not apply stickers to walls, they are a royal pain to clean up.

Emergency Fund

As a responsible adult you must maintain an emergency fund to pay for things you break. This is a part of responsible planning.

• Use judgement to determine risk, plan accordingly

• If anything goes horribly wrong the consequences could include personal, legal, and financial.

• Have plans for funs to immediately and voluntarily repair damage.

• Plan on a lawyer if needed, as well as bail funds

• If you annoy somebody be prepared to buy a round or four as compensation

Do Good

Shenanigans should be fun for all, they are a tool for laughter and entertainment, when they stop being fun it is no longer a shenanigan, they are just you being a jerk.

• Shenanigans should be fun for all. Bonus points if they have positive lasting benefits.

• Equipment or resources should be reused or donated to charities if possible.

• Shenanigans should make somebody laugh or smile for your efforts

• The shenanigans should be seen in a positive light by the general public.

• Allow people to opt-out

Consent

This is an additional commandment to the original 9 but its important enough to repeat.

• You must give people the ability to opt-out or otherwise provide informed consent in some way.

• Your shenanigan may make people uncomfortable or trigger them. You must make every effort to make sure people can get out of the situation. Be prepaed to deal with consequences.

• Drunk people cannot consent

• People under the age of majority cannot consent

• Power imbalances between parties also prevent informed consent. This includes boss/employee, mentor/mentee, or other power imbalance relationships.

Know your venue

What was acceptable at DEFCON may not work at THOTCON or Derbycon (and vice versa), know your event/conference, and tailor your shenanigan accordingly.

• If doing adult themed shenanigans make sure kids at the venue are in bed

• If doing anything interactive that may be offensive don’t make it seem like its mandatory.

• Again do not permanently alter the venue, this cannot be stressed enough.

• Honor airspace restrictions unless you have all relevant authorizations.

Petty Tresspass

So when performing shenanigans you may need to perform petty tresspass. Ensure you know your venue and cooordinate with security staff. Some areas the venue or security staff will look the other way or provide an escort. Some areas will get you ejected or banned outright.

• Do not tresspass with a Blood Alcohol Content (BAC) over .08, some parts of the venue may be dangerous.

• Do not damage property

• Don’t access hazard areas or bypass safety devices, do not access elevator shafts, electrical hazard zones, confined spaces, or other areas hazardous to life and limb, even if you are qualified.

• Have bail money

Parachute Operations

Yes the church of wifi has a parachute division, we parachute plastic army men and stuffed animals. I don’t know why its a thing but it is.

• Make sure you run calculations for the following: force of object impact with parachute, descent rate with parachute, force of object impact with parachute or harness failure, descent rate with parachute or harness failure, parachute deployment time/distance.

• Have multiple spotters and a videographer

• Ge venue permission, they will eject you if you don’t

• Use rocketry rated rip stop nylon or other purpose designed parachutes

Security Staff

Security staff love a well planned shenanigan and will even assist you, however you shenanigan must be funny or otherwise cool enough. They may help you in the following ways:

• Escort you through restricted areas

• Distract venue security guards

• Hide you from conference organizers

• Give you ideas during the planning phase

• Get you access to restricted areas

• Act as a spotter

• Help you get venue permission

Security staff love shenanigans, make sure its awesome and ask nicely, they may just help you out.

How to conduct shenanigans safely

Talk on how to conduct shenanigand safely